I don’t mind black people – just not in my area
February 6, 2008
Bizarre as it may seem, there are still those among the white community that believe that black people are some type of leper…
It’s not at all racist Errol, there a big difference between disapproving of your daughter having an interracial relationships and being opposed to them in general.
This from Stefania Harris over at Steph’s Blog. Of course it is racist Steph, you’re stopping your daughter from dating a negro purely on the basis of race. You are not interested in him as a person, nor what he can offer, you are pre judging him based on the fact that he is a negro. That Stefania, is the very definition of racism.
Saying it is OK to discriminate against people based on race is naive and offensive. Especially from a lawyer.
February 24, 2008 at 5:35 am
I cannot believe that there are individuals that feel they are entitled to say that black people are beneath them. Remember, many black people did not ask to come here, but the Europeans came here, invaded and stole this land. It is a travesty. Black people built this country, but white people tried to steal that from them too! There is hope, however, since Obama is kicking Hillary’s butt!
February 23, 2009 at 1:10 pm
Black people didn’t “build” this country. If any race did, it was the Scots-Irish.
There is a legitimate reason for parents to be wary of their children dating a black, at least in America. Most blacks in this country subscribe to a certain culture that is generally pretty terrible. Laziness, criminality, scapegoating are all hallmarks of this culture. If I was dating a black girl, my parents would be concerned not because she was black but because she was presumably “ghetto”. Now, my parents wouldn’t be concerned because they trust my judgment, but to say that that is inherently racist behavior is just ignorant. Whites that date blacks, in my experience, are either white trash and lack self-respect or are fat and ugly. Add to the issue that if a black guy can snag a white heffer, he’ll be just as proud as can be. It’s not a healthy situation where normal people engage in normal. I’m speaking in generalizations of course, but honestly, I’ll most likely never date a black girl not because I’m racist or because blacks are a minority, I live in Detroit afterall, but rather because black girls tend to be “ghetto” and I don’t find that an attractive quality. Some crazy number of black guys between 18 and 30 are in prison or jail, something like 1-in-3, so it isn’t exactly blind racism or prejudice to worry, it’s a reaction to a social trend.
February 25, 2009 at 8:20 pm
Were I of an age where dating a young black girl would not see me being referred to as a dirty old man, I am not sure I find today’s black girls attractive either. But I believe that is more to do with today’s youth than race.
You used the word trash in reference to white people only, but I think that term applies equally to whites and blacks. You see black girls as ‘ghetto’, but this isn’t really a black problem. The youth today, white or black, have little class, and the young women are most certainly not lady-like.
In my day black girls strove to behave like white girls, or at least the white girls that were well off. Today it appears that those roles have been reversed, white girls strive to be ‘black’. However the ignorant, rude, poorly dressed, ill mannered black youths of today bear no resemblance to real black culture, certainly no black culture that I am a part of.
Naturally this isn’t a problem with all youth, I am sure that there are plenty of white girls and black girls that do behave with decorum and dignity. There is just likely to be far more white girls that behave in this manner, than Negro.
As for dating a Negro, the question is Mr. Wigley, would you date a black girl who was from a similar background to yourself, or who was not ‘ghetto’?
The original point was that the Stefania Harris was all for interracial relationships, she just wouldn’t want anyone in her family to have one. I believe that she also stated that she did not find Negro men attractive, both of those statements are racist. You appear to be saying something different, that you believe that you most likely would not find a black girl attractive and that this is more down to her lifestyle than personal appearance. Do you find any black women attractive?
As for your parents, would they revise their opinion if they met your hypothetical Negro girlfriend, and found her to be beautiful, charming and a positive delight?
It is too easy, and for some apparently an instant reaction to anything that criticises anyone who happens to be black, to claim that racism is a factor, or even the cause. I too would be wary if my grandaughter were to inform me that her boyfriend were black. If he were white I wouldn’t be as concerned. Racism? No, I would prefer than she marry a black man (which in itself may be racist), but I know that the chances are that most young blacks males are no good, and decent young black men these days are like gold dust. A white boyfriend would be far less likely to be ‘trash’, although these days most youths seem to follow the same lazy, ignorant culture. A minefield indeed, thankfully she is too young for any that nonsense yet, I hope!
I believe it is one in ten, but still a remarkable figure and a clear demonstration that the stereotype is not misplaced. The figures for Britain are equally troubling, 20% of the prison population is black, but just 2% of the general population is black.
It is all too easy to blame white people, racism and poverty for such a situation, but I do not believe it. I suffered all three but do not have a criminal record. No, we cannot claim that white people are racist, prejudging us and labelling us as miscreants, whilst the evidence is clearly showing that, on average we are far more likely to be than any other race.
The thing that I cling to is that when us Negroes first arrived in Britain, back in the 50s, this wasn’t the case. I am not sure how it was in the US. We were judged unfairly back then, now it seems we have spent the past 50 years justifying that prejudice.
February 26, 2009 at 6:47 am
Well yes. We all have our preferences, I’m more attracted to black girls than most (white) guys I’ve known, but I wouldn’t date most, and that is surely to do with culture. But it is a culture mostly unique to black people in this country.
Ghetto is just a word with its own affiliations. White trash is a moniker held for certain people, and I use ghetto in much the same respect. You’re right, regardless of class most chicks these days are classless, but class and culture still have their meaning.
Man, I would of loved to have been around in your day. I can’t really comment on “real” black culture because all we have in Detroit is a bad culture. Blacks in my country misbehave and act utterly classless, in addition to harboring serious criminal tendencies, yet white people here strive to emulate them, as they have become the emblem of masculinity in a perverse twist. Nothing masculine about abandoning your children and using weapons to commit violence. That’s the thing, culture is spiraling downwards and in my country at least, the black community is at the heart of the issue. They wonder why they have so many problems succeeding and fail to call out their own actions! It’s very frustrating and demoralizing, I wonder if things will ever change. It must be doubly frustrating for yourself, having lived in a time when blacks (where you lived at least) apparently raised the bar higher for themselves. I don’t mean to delineate along racial lines too much, clearly there is an equally distressing problem with white trash in my country, but it’s all the same.
Indeed, even in Detroit we have class acts. Many of my black coworkers, despite being from severe backgrounds, had the basics right when it came to class and character. They could have benefited from a different environment no doubt.
I would certainly date a black girl who acted like a lady. The problem is, most don’t, and it bothers me most white people can’t raise these issues without being branded a racist. We all have our prejudices, but complaining about a racial issue does not immediately make one racist. I’ll be the first to admit my unjust prejudices when everyone else agrees to speak openly about these things.
I don’t know much about the chick in question, from what I found she sounded a bit touched, but my point was simply that in the black community (at least in America) a certain culture pervades which poisons the development of the people, and so it’s safe to assume that most black people in America are fairly classless. Hate to say it, but it doesn’t make it untrue, and even though most of us won’t admit it, we are all aware of this fact. That is why I can understand some people being uncomfortable with a black-white romantic relationship. And of course there are still a lot of people who are just plain racist.
I find a lot of black women attractive. I used to find them unattractive, but when I moved to Detroit and lived among them, things just kind of changed. One thing I don’t find attractive is corn rows though!
Yeah, my parents wouldn’t be a good example, my Dad would probably be pleased if I dated someone of another race, and my Mom would trust my judgment. I think most prejudiced people would change their opinion if their child dated a black person who was clearly classy and honorable, but generalizations are the rule of the day.
“Racism? No, I would prefer than she marry a black man (which in itself may be racist),”
Not necessarily racist, as I said we’re all prejudiced, and I don’t think that is inherently wrong as long as we temper our prejudice with a cool head and show people respect, but I must say it DOES suck to be the minority as I now know.
“A white boyfriend would be far less likely to be ‘trash’, although these days most youths seem to follow the same lazy, ignorant culture.”
True, I’ve come to view all classes as being generally equally repulsive, having lived in various places, however blacks tend to be more violent and degrading towards others, which I think is the lynchpin for prejudice.
I do believe my figure is correct, not specifically those in jail, but anyone who is involved in any stage of the correctional system, including probation. Many people like to point out how the Irish were when they emigrated to America, as an excuse for minority crime, but that isn’t exactly fair because the Irish were a huge problem for us and only through much struggling was that problem overcome.
Indeed, I’ve had what most would consider a difficult life, but I take my blows in stride and make the best of it, as did my immigrant grandparents. The thing that irritates me, and I feel is the reason blacks have failed to catch up, is that in America, they blame everyone for everything and fail to take responsibility for their mistakes. This allows them to justify not trying. It’s very frustrating.
Thanks for your time, cheers.
Ross